Random Kiwi thoughts, part 1

Random thoughts and observations from New Zealand, of which I have plenty, so I'll probably do this in two goes.

No, I have seen no Kiwi (birds), although I did hear one one evening (they are nocturnal). Yes, I have eaten Kiwi (fruit), which actually comes from China. I've even had a golden kiwi.

Every single Kiwi (person) feels that it is their responsibility to give you a little history of the area/country. Given how many different Kiwis I've met, I feel that I might be able to recite the Treaty of Waitangi (the agreement between the Maoris and Europeans in 1840).

When Aussies and Kiwis talk about "the bush" they really just mean the woods. Let's for a moment imagine that Robert Frost was from Down Under. "Whose bush this is I think I know..."

In small NZ towns, one shop will act as the post office, information center, local museum, gift shop, Internet center, and, if you're lucky, cafe and general store as well.

At a restaurant the other day I heard, in succession, I Will Survive, Lady (by Lionel Richie), and The Gambler. Flash back to elementary school and a sing-along-o-rama!

New Zealand money is actually printed in Australia.

I misread "AERO CLUB" as "AFRO CLUB". Common mistake, I'm sure. (I actually saw a couple people of African descent the other day. Not a lot of African blacks here, although the Maori refer to themselves as blacks.)

I still don't know about the water flushing down the toilet in reverse, but I can tell you that the hot and cold taps are often reversed. But not always. Someone please explain that to me.

Maybe they have this in new buildings at home (which I have apparently not been in), but I was surprised the other day when I went to get on an elevator, and instead of pushing an up or down call button, you pushed the number of the floor. Once inside the elevator, there were no numbers. (Yes, it was confusing to me.)

I saw a guy throwing bread to the pigeons.... but he was throwing it into the street. Trying to keep the bird population down?

The Wellington Museum tells the history of the city, and the first exhibit is a little replica of the old wharves, complete with rat scurrying along the bags of grain.

I saw four women walking down a pedestrian mall in Wellington (a couple older women, a younger one whose face was painted like a vampire) carrying a bathtub. (Not clawfoot.)

From a distance, alpaca look like giant roosters. Shorn alpaca look like giant poodles. (Not sure what I'd eaten or drunk that day....)

There are no superhighways here. In and out of the really big cities you might get two or three lanes, but in between cities and towns, the roads are two lanes-- one in each direction-- and many of the bridges are only one lane. So when looking at distances, don't think you'll be doing 60mph (or even kph!).

I saw a guy at a restaurant in Christchurch shooing away the gulls with a Super Soaker.

In the Cantebury Museum they have the Paua Shell House. This is the reconstructed living room of Fred and Myrtle Somebody. The display started with a little video. I was a bit worried when the door to the screening room closed with an ominous click. Had we just been locked in so we couldn't escape the movie about NZ kitsch?

On the way to Queenstown the bus was driving alongside a creek. I saw someone all togged up in scuba gear standing in it.

Have you noticed road signs with lots of little dents in them? I always assumed it was kids shooting the signs with BB guns or something. I saw one down here which had a hole the size of a golf ball blown through it. No idea what made that.

I didn't get to go to the Hokitika Sock Machine Museum. Bummer.

I officially turned into my grandmother when I wrapped up my extra bun-- and the free butter-- and put it into my bag for later.

They talk about pies here a lot, but theirs are made of possum, rabbit, deer, venison, goat...

I saw a sign that said "Sandflies arrive on mass."

Old bathtubs are scattered throughout fields here as drinking troughs for the animals. Where do the farmers get so many old tubs from?

Dogs like to eat crap (literally) sometimes. Dogs like to rub their muzzles against your leg sometimes. Sometimes dogs leave crap on your leg.

I was drinking water that tasted a bit funny. I asked my hostess if she'd put some herb in it (sage?). No, just lemon. A few minutes later I did see a leaf in my glass. No, wait, those are wings. And the legs are floating over here...

In Tauranga, I stayed at a house around the corner from the oldest Kiwi vines in NZ.

The people over here don't wear shoes much either. One day my barefoot host took me to a cafe, a Target-like store, the grocery... Apparently these people missed the day in biology class where they talked about all the diseases and worms that you could get through your feet. (I'm not usually one to worry about hygiene, but that always stayed with me.)

That's it for now. More later.